r/aww Dec 03 '21 Gold 1 Helpful 34 Wholesome 74 Super Heart Eyes 1 Blow a Kiss 1 Silver 56 Heartwarming 1 This 1 2020 Veteran 1

When scratches on the butt are life

74.0k Upvotes

1.2k

u/octropos Dec 03 '21

Wow I really wanna scratch that floof with both hands

328

u/hisnameisbrock Dec 03 '21

They’re such inadequate scritches in this vid 😫

17

u/CatheyCoon Dec 03 '21

That is the cutest darn thing I have seen in longer than I can remember!!

45

u/Rum_Hamburglar Dec 03 '21

scritch might be my new favorite word

89

u/egonz10 Dec 03 '21

This your first day on Reddit?

12

u/detective_chubbs Dec 03 '21

Ear scritches be where it’s at

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6

u/peter_park_here Dec 03 '21

I'm probably going to be downvoted here but... it's important to not scratch them too hard and too often in this spot because it can cause skin problems for them that are impossible for them to lick better.

It feels good so they do their best to get that good feeling but it's important to be careful as well.

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u/TheDesktopNinja Dec 03 '21

Hopefully when they're not holding the camera in one hand, they use both for better scritches

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4.3k

u/unbridled_puppetry Dec 03 '21

This is dangerous levels of cuteness

908

u/MeowMIX___ Dec 03 '21

Can confirm with experience. Source: my full grown mustang loves butt scratches and will turn his butt to you for scratches. Considering that’s also horse language for “back off, imma kick you” it can be a bit unnerving at times…

364

u/i_is_snoo Dec 03 '21 Helpful

TIL Muscle Cars like butt scritches too.

91

u/[deleted] Dec 03 '21

[removed]

25

u/i_is_snoo Dec 03 '21

It's all starting to make sense.

17

u/J3ffyD Dec 03 '21

Mine purrs real loud when you give her scratchies.

10

u/KamTros47 Dec 04 '21

Gotta be careful of that stance though, Mustang kicks have a ton of horsepower

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u/unbridled_puppetry Dec 03 '21

Awwww you’re lucky!

19

u/suer72cutlass Dec 04 '21

My mare wanted her udders rubbed/scratched. She'd walk up to you and lift her leg like a dog for you to rub them. Sometimes they had waxy stuff on them. If she decided you weren't done she'd follow you around the yard and head push you then lift her leg again. You had to oblige.

11

u/Covertpoet Dec 03 '21

Not gonna lie, misread this as mustache…definitely had a strange picture in my mind

15

u/shartshappen612 Dec 03 '21

Thank you. I know very little about horses but want to pet every animal that will take pets. I have told myself, with a horse though, dont extend my fingers and DON'T STAND BEHIND IT! I feel like this is a good base.

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u/aidissonance Dec 03 '21 edited Dec 04 '21

I would be worried about taking a couple of hooves to the gut but glad he enjoyed the ass scritches

68

u/mirrorwolf Dec 03 '21

I don't think that's a concern. They mainly only kick as a defense mechanism or if they're startled. I willingly trotting backwards towards her means he views her as safe

67

u/HotFightingHistory Dec 03 '21

It's actually even the right way to pass behind a horse if you need to. You put your hand on their rump as a sort of 'thats me moving behind you' notification before you pass around behind them. I learned it in my high school VoAg program :)

Edit - Yeah was a long time ago and now that I recall I think im talking about cows. Anyways the point is I don't know a darn thing :)

59

u/MeowMIX___ Dec 03 '21

Nah you got it exactly right! The same applies to horses. Another bonus to this tactic is that when you’re so close they can’t extend their leg out for a full kick, so you might just get bumped. If you’re close enough to get kicked but not close enough to touch their rump, you may end up with some hoof prints!

6

u/Kckc321 Dec 03 '21

They can’t kick you if you’re close? I’be barely even touched a horse, this is super interesting

28

u/hanikamiya Dec 03 '21

They can, it's just that the kick doesn't have a lot of force behind it, like you trying to punch somebody hugging you

but the touching part is mostly not to startle this big strong flight animal that has some ten times your mass, I guess

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14

u/EternalPragmatist Dec 03 '21

Many years ago I had to walk behind a frightened horse. A storm was approaching across the plains, and the horses in our group were very nervous and bunching together. We were pretty inexperienced, and some people were losing control of their horses, so I had to walk around behind one to get to mine. I followed directions and stayed close with my hand on its rump. The horse kicked and I got launched about 10 feet. It hurt, but that was much better than what could’ve happened if I’d been hit by its hooves.

4

u/MeowMIX___ Dec 03 '21

They can try, and I mean technically they are kicking. I guess a better way to put it would be they can’t kick as hard as they probably could given the chance to fully extend their legs.

5

u/courser Dec 03 '21

Foals will often kick playfully or in a random fit of temper, actually. ESPECIALLY when they don't have good manners yet. This video is super cute, and the foal here was more or less being fairly polite, but I was holding my breath because a kick here was absolutely possible!

1.9k

u/SchnoodleDoodleDo Dec 03 '21 Silver Helpful Wholesome Starry Heartwarming Wholesome Seal of Approval Masterpiece That Smile

'This is dangerous levels of cuteness...'


when a human's close to me,

i turn my back, so they can see

am waiting for relief to come -

Please, human - won't you ScRaTcH my Bumm ?!

there's places that i just can't reach,

so Everyone i gotta Teach!

enjoy the scratch from friend or stranger,

(Caution: Cuteness level - Danger!)

Every time the scratch i got,

i do my Happy Pony trot :)

n then they say 'You cute smol horse!

Do you want More ??'

Of Course!

Of Course!

❤️

270

u/VaryaKimon Dec 03 '21

Schnoodle is the best redditor. 😍

88

u/WHRocks Dec 03 '21

According to Schnoodle's flair, Redditors tend to agree!

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82

u/Gilneah Dec 03 '21

FRESH SCHNOODLE

15

u/One_Man_Boyband Dec 03 '21

Whats a Schnoodle?

23

u/seeyatt Dec 03 '21

It's a Schnauzer-Poodle but a SchnoodleDoodleDo is what's written here for you!

22

u/Draano Dec 03 '21 edited Dec 03 '21

u/SchnoodleDoodleDo is the resident cuteness poet. Have a look at all their prior posts. 3.2 million comment karma.

People refer to the poems as schnoodles.

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19

u/Acceptable-Stick-688 Dec 03 '21

ONLY 10 MINUTES OLD

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u/myearwood Dec 04 '21

If you repeatedly read that aloud for an hour, you'll be a little hoarse. ;)

26

u/MrSquidward1 Dec 03 '21

YES I LOVE YOUR LITTLE POEMS

6

u/Prestigious-Zone7088 Dec 03 '21

Every time I see your name I know I’m in for a treat Schnoodle, keep doing what you do

9

u/Jander97 Dec 03 '21

Something something fresh schnoodle something something

3

u/YouPulledMeBackIn Dec 03 '21

Mas Schnoodle, Mas smiles! Always a pleasure!

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16

u/celebrityBiguy Dec 03 '21

This is also THE DANGER ZONE for most horses, mules. Their back-kick is the only active defense against a predator.

While this video does belong in r/aww, it should have a disclaimer not to try this yourself.

31

u/gcd_cbs Dec 03 '21

It is a danger zone, but it's a myth that horses/mules can only kick backwards. They are capable of kicking in any direction, it's just that the backwards kick is the most powerful and sort of their "go-to." They can still do plenty of damage with a sideways or front kick though.

Also, don't forget that horses have teeth. They can and will bite when threatened.

Summary: horses have multiple ways to defend themselves

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u/ErgonomicZero Dec 03 '21

New business idea: Horse ass rake! Safety and pleasure in one!

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10

u/FragrantExcitement Dec 03 '21

So I get a different reaction when I stick my butt in someone's face.

32

u/twisted_voices Dec 03 '21

I never thought that turning your back on someone was cute. But, I’ll maybe make an exception.

12

u/unbridled_puppetry Dec 03 '21

When it’s a little fuzzy butt we allow it! <3

7

u/SexyPewPew Dec 03 '21

I mean... my butt is pretty fuzzy

42

u/imeatingpizzaritenow Dec 03 '21

I am melting as we speak

4

u/Piepounding Dec 03 '21

I hear ya, my cat Lucy expects copious amounts of butt scratches. When she gets them, she drools puddles.

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2.1k

u/fluffy_treesnake Dec 03 '21

I didn't say you could be done!

393

u/m0rris0n_hotel Dec 03 '21

No if’s, ands or butts but’s

132

u/VoyagerCSL Dec 03 '21

I’m curious why you think “ands” and “butts” don’t need apostrophes, but “ifs” and “buts” do.

54

u/DervishSkater Dec 03 '21

Because there are no ifs and’s or buts

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249

u/johnnyorganic Dec 03 '21

BUTTSCRATCHER!

75

u/TotallynotAlpharius2 Dec 03 '21

BUTTSCRATCHER!

50

u/TheApathyParty2 Dec 03 '21

BUTTSCRATCHER?

42

u/SimSimmaToronto Dec 03 '21

BUTTSCRATCHERR!

7

u/Myhotrabbi Dec 04 '21

I love that this joke is 14 years old and still hilarious

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30

u/ygo271 Dec 03 '21

Our prices has never been lower

28

u/qwors Dec 03 '21

You are referencing the office while the guy you replied to is referencing Family Guy.

24

u/ygo271 Dec 03 '21

Win-win ?

6

u/SouldiesButGoodies84 Dec 03 '21

Certainly is Dwight.

4

u/ima_gnu Dec 04 '21

Win-win-win, Dwigt

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467

u/ComfortablePlant826 Dec 03 '21

Maybe scratch for more than three seconds!!

161

u/harrietthugman Dec 03 '21

Bet they're afraid of getting kicked through lol

170

u/liquid_languor Dec 03 '21

Horses don't just kick you, especially if they know you and are enjoying the scratches. They kick when startled or upset, which doesn't apply to this lil baby.

135

u/harrietthugman Dec 03 '21

Foals and yearlings startle easily in my experience, so I'd rather not risk standing there. Despite their size they pack quite a punch!

Plus standing next to them lets you rub the butt and ears

23

u/liquid_languor Dec 03 '21

I have to disagree but that's just me. My foals/yearlings have never been any easier to spook than my grown horses, if they're properly worked with. Babies love butt scratches. I've only been kicked twice in my life and it was while I was riding a horse and got too close to another.

52

u/harrietthugman Dec 03 '21

I'm glad you survived it!

You clearly respect and know how to handle your animals. I just commented that as a disclaimer to folks not familiar with horses. I'd hate for someone to try this cute maneuver without knowing how dangerous they can be

46

u/blitzandsplitz Dec 03 '21

What’s to be scared of?

Just a couple of thousand psi of force moving through a blunt hard hoof between two mammal friends.

26

u/omgdude29 Dec 03 '21

"Horses are dangerous at both ends and crafty in the middle."

  • Sherlock Holmes

3

u/damdam100 Dec 04 '21

Crafty in the middle? What does that mean?

5

u/5P4ZZW4D Dec 04 '21

My dad was showing me a horse, who when he did his saddle up held his breath out the whole time. Even up until my Da mounted. Then! Then the little blighted let out all the air and the saddle was super loose, leaving my dad, who'd caught himself by one hand one the ground as the saddle came loose and slid him to the side, pivoting by that one hand, legs trying desperately to hold on, as this horse walked him round and round in circles. I eventually helped after I could walk again after laughing too hard. Crafty! Verry crafty!

9

u/liquid_languor Dec 03 '21

That's fair I understand! Probably a good idea, haha.

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u/bebesee Dec 04 '21

You could always scritch from the side.

2

u/harrietthugman Dec 04 '21

Yep! How I do it, so you can get the ears too

508

u/knoxknight Dec 03 '21

We don't deserve butts.

272

u/celluj34 Dec 03 '21

- Tina Belcher

78

u/steveofthejungle Dec 03 '21

We also don’t deserve horses

  • Also Tina Belcher

14

u/white_android Dec 03 '21

Read all the replies in her voice. It's horrible.

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u/Skye-Diver Dec 03 '21

This is not the butt we need, but the butt we deserve..

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u/mydaycake Dec 03 '21

The side trot is to die for

6

u/AllPurple Dec 03 '21

How the hell is this the highest upvoted top level comment that talks about the side trot. With only 4 upvotes!

2

u/mydaycake Dec 03 '21

Thanks! I am surprised there aren’t more comments about this legend of a trot. Not even looking, just dance trot to the hand lol

47

u/MituButChi Dec 03 '21

The thumbnail is... very very concerning

5

u/layla815 Dec 04 '21

I was wondering if anyone was going to point it out! I thought the same thing lol

2

u/aracnine Dec 04 '21

What exactly are you two seeing? Is it the white horse?

2

u/MituButChi Dec 04 '21

I erm… don’t think I should say…

2

u/Grooviemann1 Dec 04 '21

Kinda looks like he's scratching his asshole.

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u/Aankira Dec 03 '21

Don't stand behind a horse or pony they say, it's dangerous they say, this cute little one, hold my apple juice

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u/PerfectedReinvented Dec 03 '21 edited Dec 03 '21

If they know you're there it's a lot safer. Mostly it's just really unsafe to surprise them because they can't see you back there. (That's assuming the horse in question isn't an a-hole in general.)

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u/AwesomeDragon101 Dec 03 '21

Yup, most horses are completely fine as long as you keep a hand on them at all times as you walk behind them. That way they don’t stop seeing you and then get startled when they hear you behind them, keeping a hand on them ensures they know where you are at all times and therefore they won’t get spooked.

Also, stay very close to the horse. It sounds counterintuitive, but the closer you are to them, the less acceleration they get if they kick you, and therefore the kick isn’t nearly as bad. It’s the difference between getting tapped/slightly pushed and getting completely decked.

37

u/joeyheartbear Dec 03 '21

It's all well and good until you meet the Bruce Lee of horses and they hit you with their one inch kick.

20

u/CrippledBalls Dec 03 '21 edited Dec 03 '21

sheathes leg

"You're already dead"

5

u/flubberFuck Dec 03 '21

soul flies out of body

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u/UndeadCandle Dec 03 '21

Pretty fun imagery.

Now i'm also imagining a horse with swole hind legs as if it did body building, trains daily and can now kick and cleave small trees.

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u/BananaGarlicBread Dec 03 '21

Yep that's what I was taught, if you need to walk behind a horse, leave a hand on its butt so they're not spooked. I'm not dead so it worked.

3

u/PerfectedReinvented Dec 03 '21

Back when I had my own if I took my hands off them in a blind spot I'd talk or sing to them so they still knew where I was.

2

u/Harmaakettu Dec 03 '21

I was taught to gently talk to our horses constantly so they'd know I was around by sound. Start talking when you go in and keep talking all the way until you leave. Works with cows as well!

2

u/komocode Dec 03 '21

Do they ever kick back by accident despite knowing you?

8

u/PerfectedReinvented Dec 03 '21

It's not impossible but I don't think it's common at all.

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u/Specter1125 Dec 03 '21

It’s more so don’t stand behind a horse you don’t know when it doesn’t know you’re there.

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u/Lexi_Banner Dec 03 '21

I have a video of my horse somewhere in which I am hosing him off on a hot day, and he keeps turning his bum and backing into the spray. It's hilarious.

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u/nethobo Dec 03 '21

You threatened to stop scritches, and he told you to . . . . PONY UP

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u/MJKee9 Dec 03 '21

(•_•)

( •_•)>⌐■-■

(⌐■_■),

17

u/100WattTubeTop Dec 03 '21

YEAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

6

u/wackbirds Dec 03 '21

Nicely done

308

u/Otherwise_Carob_4057 Dec 03 '21 Helpful Wholesome

This is actually in reverse the man is chasing that poor horse

193

u/RussBof6 Dec 03 '21 edited Dec 03 '21

118

u/slams-head-on-desk Dec 03 '21

All the horses walking backwards at the end was the best

16

u/hippiesrock03 Dec 03 '21

Your horses don't walk backwards?

5

u/BlackKrow Dec 03 '21

Your horses walk?

2

u/szniocsa Dec 03 '21

This statement is true of both the forward and the reverse gif.

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u/cxrvs_ Dec 03 '21

Hahaha

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u/braden87 Dec 03 '21 edited Dec 03 '21

I'm gonna run away, but make sure the thing you want that I don't want you to get is between you and my head

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u/duaneap Dec 03 '21

The claw!

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u/PRSouthern Dec 03 '21

Amazing.

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u/[deleted] Dec 03 '21

[deleted]

7

u/Broken_Petite Dec 03 '21

Something tells me Mr. Adorable Ass here wouldn’t get the memo 😝

66

u/RockafellerHillbilly Dec 03 '21

Protip: stand on side of Equidae to scritch rear of Equidae.

18

u/AJWinky Dec 03 '21

It's more exciting to be in the Kick Zone, though

13

u/hydro_wonk Dec 03 '21

It's the autoerotic asphyxiation of scritchies

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u/Boloar Dec 03 '21

When a pony demands butt scratches, it's cute.

When I demand butt scratches, I get banned from Starbucks. Go figure.

#doublestandards

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u/beefer Dec 03 '21

Przewalski’s Horse methinks

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u/o3mta3o Dec 03 '21

LOL. What's wrong with you? Get in there with both hands and SCRATCH

82

u/[deleted] Dec 03 '21

[removed]

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u/aphrodesa Dec 03 '21

The cat was just overstimulated. It didn't orgasm. Source: vet tech. It happens when they're upset quite often; I promise you that's not what that video was.

8

u/Errorfull Dec 03 '21

That makes me feel a lot better. Dogs too I hope?

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u/Gghh Dec 03 '21

... why do I want to see this now??

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u/MellowStein Dec 03 '21

Bro I'm just gonna pretend I didn't read that...

4

u/___ElJefe___ Dec 03 '21

Go check out catbongos subreddit. It was a big fucking deal yesterday.

2

u/VORTXS Dec 03 '21

Seems to have been removed

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u/ce2c61254d48d38617e4 Dec 03 '21

Damn, I still need to see it

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u/Sheepard2003 Dec 03 '21

Where you going my bootie still itches!!!

8

u/Eric12345 Dec 03 '21

Confusing thumbnails

3

u/gd_lucyfreindasher Dec 03 '21

Giving an ass an ass scratch

3

u/JeweltheTiger Dec 03 '21

My dog does that when she wants Butt Schrichs.

3

u/VonAshley Dec 03 '21

Mine too! A friend once asked "Does she not like me?" cause she walks up to you and immediately turns her back on you. No no, just demanding the butt scratches!

3

u/ktayyy Dec 03 '21

My dog lives for butt scritches

3

u/SomeGuyWithPlotArmor Dec 03 '21

Imagine: A stranger jumps in front of you, sticks their ass in your face and expect you to scratch that

3

u/Birbieboy Dec 03 '21

I would do the same if ppl scratched my butt.

WHY IS NO ONE SCRATCHING MAH BUTT?!

3

u/bemusthetyrant Dec 03 '21

Real footage of me begging my husband for back scratches

3

u/lloyd____ Dec 03 '21

She’s a real grab ass

3

u/iitzjackal Dec 03 '21

I had a horse that if you got near her she would kick fart and run away. In that order, every time. She was a rescue and one bitchy old nag but I loved her

9

u/dogchowtoastedcheese Dec 03 '21

Adorable. The Scottish accent is the cherry on top!

3

u/hoojen22 Dec 03 '21

Yeah, this is one of the few times where sound on improved the experience haha

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u/redditForSoccer Dec 03 '21

He reverses into the butt scratch spot

3

u/Dalehjds Dec 03 '21

I Really Love It

2

u/partialcremation Dec 03 '21

I tried searching for an answer, but it only returned disturbing links. Why do animals like butt scratches so much? Dogs tend to love them and I've known dogs to stick their tongues out repeatedly while having their butt scratched. Anybody know why?

9

u/recursion8 Dec 03 '21

Prob just a hard spot to reach for themselves so they don't often get to satisfy an itch there, when they find someone willing to scratch them there they don't let it go easily. Source: my dog gets tired of head scritches real fast but will take butt scratches for as long as you're giving them

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u/Giraffardson Dec 03 '21

I just saw someone do this to their cat in the tub the other day and the cat had an orgasm

2

u/calexil Dec 03 '21

careful, it might orgasm soon...

2

u/doomvetch92 Dec 03 '21

That is a fluffy horse.

2

u/Material_Cheetah934 Dec 03 '21

Haha my gsd does this too! She won’t let you pass if you don’t scratch her rear.

2

u/reese_pieces97 Dec 03 '21

This is me during ovulation…

2

u/Honourstly Dec 03 '21

I guess this is my life now

2

u/throwaway19957151 Dec 03 '21

after watching that cat video i aint scratching any animals butt lol

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u/[deleted] Dec 03 '21

You should be aware: One scritch = life sentence

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u/The-true-Memelord Dec 03 '21

Aww so adorable!!

2

u/ebaljojo228 Dec 03 '21

Axaxaxxxaxaxax

2

u/FrEnZy-UK Dec 03 '21

Buttscratcher!.. buttscratcher!

2

u/Sham_Pain_Renegade Dec 03 '21

This is pretty close to what my cat does. Without the galloping. That’s why his name is ButtButt, he’s all about presenting his butt towards you for scritchies and butt bongos.

2

u/kitchen_clinton Dec 03 '21

It's a unicorn in disguise.

2

u/Consistent_Charge239 Dec 03 '21

Legends says shes still scratching till this day😂

2

u/poo-rag Dec 03 '21

Who wouldn't enjoy having their butt tickled?

2

u/milesdizzy Dec 03 '21

My cat will start meow-barking at me when I stop giving him lower back pats, dudes a lil’ scamp

2

u/KevinAlertSystem Dec 03 '21

'bitch did i say u could stop'

2

u/A_HECKIN_DOGGO Dec 03 '21

Oh to be a fuzzy Scottish pony getting bum scritches

2

u/Evilkenevil77 Dec 04 '21

My dog was obsessed with butt scratches too. They must feel really good. It’s wonderful that we have a world full of animals who enjoy being petted.

2

u/TheBarkingGallery Dec 04 '21

Butt scratches are a universal truth. Find someone to scratch your butt like this and you’ll see.

2

u/MightywarriorEX Dec 04 '21

What? No “back that ass up” jokes yet?

2

u/fluidmind23 Dec 04 '21

Man that thumbnail... Made a risky click

2

u/midnightbizou Dec 04 '21

Well, I guess I'd be there in that field scratchin' butts until I was allowed to leave.

2

u/Burnd1t Dec 04 '21

That thumbnail looks NSFW as fuck

2

u/ignoranceisbliss101 Dec 04 '21

Isn’t that an Erogenous zone for a lot of animals?

2

u/chilly2121 Dec 04 '21

I think he wants some anal mate.

2

u/larsnation Dec 04 '21

I remember reading under a different post l that cats get sexually aroused when scrached on their Back end, i wonder if thats the case here as well

4

u/Barry-Goodknight Dec 03 '21

thats adorable. what is it? mini-horse?

5

u/poodooloo Dec 03 '21

Looks like a baby of the one in the background...possibly a draft breed

11

u/sansabeltedcow Dec 03 '21

Looks like a Norwegian Fjord Horse.

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u/Deagantio Dec 03 '21

Humanity: What is my purpose?

God: You're supposed to help scratch the butts of animals because I was too lazy to give them hands. Those seven days were on a budget, you know.

5

u/zimbacca Dec 03 '21

As adorable as this is, I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to stand directly behind a horse.

38

u/plugtrio Dec 03 '21

Its not the best idea if you have no horse experience or instinct. In practice, people who have horses end up standing behind their butt quite a bit. You learn ways of letting the horse know you're going to be back there, like starting your petting where they can see you and then moving back.

Also if you must be in the danger zone it's safer to be as close to them as possible. They need room to kick. They'll try to get a little space on you to do it.

And lastly, this is a foal. A lot of horse training involves teaching the little guys good social manners while you're still big enough to them that they can't push you around. Then as they get older and bigger, you never let them know they could push you around if they wanted.

Sorry if that's a bit of an info dump. I was lucky to take a horse training elective in college and it was probably the most rewarding and enjoyable class I took in undergrad. We all got assigned a weanling and by the end of the course had to have them halter trained and able to walk in/back out of a trailer, in addition to learning grooming and hoof care. We also had them go over some basic obstacle courses with scary horse traps (i.e., a TARP on the GROUND!)

3

u/thisismenow1989 Dec 03 '21

That sounds so neat! I'd love to do a horse course!

3

u/Broken_Petite Dec 03 '21

I found this informative (and adorable!), thanks!

The tarp on the ground comment made me laugh 😆

26

u/skrgirl Dec 03 '21

Horses can kick you from any angle. The reason they tell you not to stand directly behind them is that its a blind spot to them and you can scare them. If you know what you're doing, and they know you're there, you are generally fine.

3

u/SuddenDeathWish Dec 03 '21

never approach a bull from the front, a horse from the rear, or a fool from any direction

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